Make Me Obvious?

For every day use, I wish there was something I could wear or temporarily tattoo on my forehead, just to explain to people how I feel that day, and to make my pain more obvious to those that are completely oblivious around me.

For example, a trip to ASDA, I’d have “Yes I can park in this disabled space, and you don’t need to watch me to see how “disabled” I look”. Perhaps a shortened version, but you get the drift!

Perhaps on the days that I really don’t want to talk to anyone, let alone be asked “how are you” I could have something like “leave me alone – pain making me grumpy”.

I don’t know how you “get over” this feeling, but this feeling has stuck with me, ever since the first day I was glowered at and made a joke of for parking in a disabled space.  Those catty women will not forget me in a hurry that’s for sure (Especially when I screamed at them and asked if they had a problem!!) But just as they wont forget me, I can’t forget them.  That day bloody hurt every emotion and bone in my body.  I’ll never forget how 2 grown women made me feel. Never. 

I don’t want to be like this.  I don’t want to have to justify every move I make, why I park in a disabled space, why I have a crutch or why I haven’t done my hair that day.  

Gone are the days when I could walk up the street or to the shops and not one person would take any notice of me.  Now it’s like a magnet is permanently attached to me, attracting all the horrible nasty people, along with their comments and questions. *Sigh*.

Perhaps I need a neon sign, sorta like where my halo would be (if it hadn’t slipped!?), but then that would draw more unwanted attention!

Perhaps a t-shirt with some sort of slogan?

Perhaps I just need to man up and get over the comments and dirty looks.  After all, if I advertise my chronic pain, it’s only going to draw more attention to little ol’ me!


7 thoughts on “Make Me Obvious?

  1. I totally now how you feel! I’ve often joked to my hubby that I’m going to tattoo on my head that I have M.E! I’ve only recently been formally diagnosed but have had it for at least 4 years,and in the process of applying for P.I.P. so I may get to experience the whole disabled parking thing soon. I’m sure on some days I will want to hide away and cry, but on other’s, I don’t think I’ll be able to bite my tongue!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think we all need a neon flashing sign! But then it’s actually none of anyone’s business why we have a blue badge, or get benefits, but people aren’t as welcoming as you may think! Not everyone is like that though!! There are some good eggs!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I have to keep believing in the good egg’s in this messed up world! I’ve only just found your blog but love it already. Thanks for sharing 🙂 xx

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You’re welcome, I’m new to blogging and just trying to share my experiences with chronic illness with a little poetry thrown in lol. I’m loving finding new blogs to follow xx

        Liked by 1 person

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